When Will People Stop Asking 'When Are You Having Another Kid?' & 12 Helpful Responses
By: Embracing Her Den
So, when is Jr. getting a sibling? The personal question everyone with at least one child gets asked. It’s not a malicious question and I’ll admit I’ve done it before. For me it’s the excitement of having another baby in the family or my friends having another child. Is it my decision? Absolutely not. In fact, it’s no ones but the parents alone.
You and your partner should never have to feel the need to defend yourselves. For myself, when we would get asked it felt awkward. I would be caught off guard and do the whole awkward, polite laugh. I would respond, “I don’t know”. Well, because I really didn’t.
There were several reasons. Over the course of time until I was pregnant with my second, I was asked when I would have another. I always wanted them close in age, but life had other plans. After having a traumatic birth, feeling like I had postpartum depression (undiagnosed), and my baby having colic having another baby was the last thing on my mind. My child is neurodiverse and at the time not hitting her milestones, in early intervention, and needed a lot of my attention that I was even afraid to have another. Later, it turned to my husband and I trying, and it was not happening.
It is an uncomfortable and sensitive topic for some women. You do not know what people are going through and it’s a very invasive question.
Next time you think to ask…DON’T. Think about the women who
are trying to conceive but it’s not working.
have a neurodiverse child that needs a lot of their time and attention right now.
just had a miscarriage.
is having anxiety about having another one.
doesn’t want any children to begin with.
is going through fertility treatments.
Responding with Grace:
I don’t have the answer for that right now.
We are trying and hopefully it will happen sooner than later.
It will happen when it’s meant to be.
I know, it’s such an exciting topic. I’ll let you know when the time comes.
Responding with Humor:
We’re having a lot of fun “trying” so maybe once it starts being boring?
Tomorrow.
When’s your birthday? (wait for response). Yep, I think I’ll choose that date.
I have my hands full with (insert children and spouse’s name) but it will eventually happen when the time is right.
Responding with Attitude:
Is (insert number) not enough?
That’s a rude thing to ask.
When you learn to mind your own business.
Why do you feel the need to ask?
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Which was your favorite meme?
0%Grow with Grace
0%Tomorrow
0%When you mind your own business
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